Last Chance to Be Wrong About What Might Be Discovered at the LHC

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The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) is now running (after a rocky start). This talk reviews why the start was rocky and how this constrains the physics program over the next few years. I will briefly survey how 'naturalness'
arguments argue why something should be discovered, and why theoretical proposals fall into three main categories. If time permits I will close by telling you why I think the cosmological constant problem implies the LHC will strike paydirt and make quantum gravity an experimental science.